We live in a world where masculinity is constantly under attack. We have all been wounded, and each wound has been a well placed shot at our strength. The reason for this is that our strength is the part of us that gives life. But this part of us is also dangerous, and because of that the world works to control it. "Our culture has turned against the masculine essence, aiming to cut it off early."
This chapter opens with a story about John's son as a first grader who gets pushed down by a bully. The instructions that John gives his son are the same I would give mine. If it happens again, get up and hit him. And the results that follow would be suspension, if not expulsion, and maybe a few lawsuits. Not to mention as a pastor I'd never hear the end of it from people. But with all of that in mind, I'd still give my son the same advice. "We do not want to teach boys that bullies should never be resisted, and we do not want to teach bullies that they can get away with it." This has happened far too much, and more and more we see the results of it.
People take guns into public places and unload them into innocent people. But do you know when they stop? When they meet resistance. There was a mall shooting in Oregon a few months ago, and there was a man there shopping with a concealed carry permit and his weapon. He heard the shots, got behind cover, took aim, but never shot because he saw people behind the shooter and was unwilling to take the risk of missing and hitting someone. But the shooter saw him, and then took his own life.
"You cannot teach a boy to use his strength by stripping him of it." But this is what society has tried to do. It has worked to emasculate boys and make them polite and moral. The Church has done something similar, telling men to be passive and forgiving, to turn the other cheek. I am all for forgiveness, and I do not advocate violence in any way "But we must not strip a man of strength and call it sanctification." "You will emasculate him for life. From that point on all will be passive and fearful. He will grow up never knowing how to stand his ground... It may look moral, it may look like turning the other cheek, but it is merely weakness. You cannot turn a cheek you do not have."
Boys have to be taught how to use their strength properly and with wisdom and control. When I was little there was a kid at Church who was constantly picking on me. My dad told me to punch him. One day I did, it was a lousy punch, but after that he stopped. I know my strength and how to use it. I was a wrestler, and if I had to I could defend myself, or my wife, with my bare hands. But I don't go around punching everyone I have a disagreement with. I know how to control my strength and use it properly. The reason society fears the strength of boys, is because there are very few men to teach them how to properly use it. There are very few men to teach them the wisdom and context of their power.
"There is the widely held idea that the aggressive nature in boys is bad, and so they must be made safe, they must be made more like girls." John points out how a lot of this came from the Columbine shooting. The several that have happened since then haven't helped. Yes, boys are different, they are aggressive, but that aggression isn't a bad thing if it is properly trained. John shares other examples from Columbine, "Seth Houy threw his body over a terrified girl to shield her from the bullets; fifteen-year-old Daniel Rohrbough paid with his life when, at mortal risk to himself, he held a door open so others could escape." What about the men who took back flight 93 on September 11, 2001? Boys who have been stripped of their strength don't grow up to be men who can do things like that. Instead they are the one's who run away to save themselves.
We need more men. We need a society that stops emasculating boys so that there are men who stand up against evil. Society realizes that men are dangerous, and that's what scares them. The strength of men that makes them dangerous "That strength so essential to men is also what makes them heroes... God made men the way they are because we desperately need them to be the way they are. Yes, a man is a dangerous thing, so is a scalpel. It can wound or it can save your life. You don't make it safe by making it dull; you put it in the hands of someone who knows what he's doing."
If society insists on making boys safe, the problems aren't going to go away. How long has it been trying to do this already? And how much worse have things gotten? The solution is not to make the scalpel dull, but to put it in the hands of a skilled surgeon. We don't make boys more like girls, we entrust them to men so that they can learn how to be men. A dull scalpel is a useless piece of metal, and a man with no strength is just taking up space.
To God alone be the Glory!
Strength and Honor
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