"Our society produces plenty of boys, but very few men. There are two simple reasons: we don't know how to initiate boys into men;and second, we're not sure we really want to." This statement reveals a fact. We are a society full of boys and there are less men everyday. The reason for this is that we no longer know how to initiate boys to manhood, and even if we did, we aren't really sure we want to do it.
"A man is a dangerous thing." That is clear, and because of that society isn't sure it wants more of them. But the danger comes and is an issue because there are too few men. Right now I'm thinking of the movie, Courageous, that was done by a church in Georgia focusing on this same issue. In the movie there is a scene where four cops, all partners, and a new man they have met, are sitting in the backyard and one of them asks, "When did you first think of yourself as a man?"
The youngest one says, "I don't know. Maybe when I moved out, or turned 21." Another one says, "When I got my license." (It's been a while since I've seen it, but I know those are the things that are mentioned.) But the new guy, Javier, says, "When my father told me I was."
How often does this still happen? I don't know that my dad ever said that to me. And honestly, I've only within the last year or so started to think of myself as a man. It's only been within that time that I've really felt that I am a man. "Most men have never been initiated into manhood. They have never had anyone show them how to do it, and especially, how to fight for their heart. The failure of so many fathers, the emasculating culture, and the passive church have left men without direction."
In order for a boy to become a man, to know that he is one, the core questions on his heart must be answered. He must see and know that he is dangerous. He must be given the opportunity to see and know that he has what it takes. "A man's core question does not got away. He may try for years to shove it out of his awareness, and just 'get on with life.' But it does not go away. It is a hunger so essential to our souls that it will compel us to find a resolution. In truth it drives everything we do."
Until a boy has an answer, everything he does works towards trying to find one. And without a man to guide his search he ends up looking in the wrong places. Some turn to the quest for wealth, but money never satisfies. Others look to achieve success, but that also leaves them empty. Some turn to sexuality, either to woman/pornography, because this at least makes them feel like a man, or others to homosexuality, trying to fill the void of masculine love. None of these work, and all of them leave a boy struggling to find an answer.
Strength that is never channeled is a dangerous thing. It's like an unstable nuclear reactor that is simply waiting to go off. Look at the recent violence in this America. My mind keeps thinking to the Sandy Hook tragedy. One of the biggest things I've noticed is the lack of mention of this young man's father. I'm not saying that the presence of a man in his life would have prevented the shooting, and I am not trying to be insensitive if I seem to be, but I have to wonder what would have happened if there had been a man in his life to guide him?
A boy needs a man in his life. Boys must be initiated into manhood by men. Boys must be taught how to use their strength, men must answer and affirm the questions on their hearts. A man must call a boy to be a man, teach him how to be one, and then affirm that he is one.
As a society, we must learn how to initiate boys into manhood, and we must not simply allow it, but desire and encourage it. We need more men.
To God alone be the Glory!
Strength and Honor
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