Your Real Friends

"Now Saul told Jonathan his son and all his servants to put David to death. But Jonathan, Saul’s son, greatly delighted in David. So Jonathan told David saying, 'Saul my father is seeking to put you to death. Now therefore, please be on guard in the morning, and stay in a secret place and hide yourself'... Then Saul sent messengers to David’s house to watch him, in order to put him to death in the morning. But Michal, David’s wife, told him, saying, 'If you do not save your life tonight, tomorrow you will be put to death.' So Michal let David down through a window, and he went out and fled and escaped." -1 Samuel 19.1-2, 11-12

Saul is once again after David, seeking to kill him and end the threat to his reign. However, David does not face this hardship alone, those closest to him are looking out for him and are doing all that they can to help and protect him. David's friend Jonathan, Saul's son, has David hide, and then speaks highly of David to his father in order to save his life. For the moment Saul's anger subsides, but it does not last. After he again tries to spear David, his wife, Michal, Saul's daughter, helps him escape from their house so he will live.

Notice who the people helping David are, Saul's children. David easily could have grown suspicious of them, thinking that they were simply working with their father to take him out. Jonathan could have had him hide in a place where an ambush had been set. Michal could have lowered him out the window and cut the rope allowing him to fall to his death. David easily could have lost faith in those closest to him because of their blood line, but he doesn't. David knows those he can trust, and rather than pushing them away out of fear that they are secretly out to get him, he trusts them and his life is saved.

In my own life, I have noticed that when things get hard, I have pushed those closest to me away, and gone it alone. I had a friend in college who was like a brother to me. A few years ago my wife and I went through a very difficult time, job loss, moving in with my parent's, unemployment and then underemployment. During this time I was very discouraged, and rather than drawing closer to a friend who had stood by me, I began to push him away. I stopped calling, and would only give one or two word responses when he would text or message me. I did the opposite of what I should have done. I have since started the process of reconciling that relationship, but my response to difficulty has impacted our friendship.

I have also noticed that in times of difficulty and stress, I tend to shut my wife out. The person in this world who is closest to me and knows me better than anyone, is often one of the first people I begin to pull away from. Rather than drawing closer to her, seeking her love and support to get through the difficult times, I have pushed her away, building walls to keep her out. This too is something I have started to work on, but it is not easy.

Men, what is your response during hard times? Do you withdraw and become isolated from those who really care about you? Or do you realize the love that they have for you and draw closer to you real friends, allowing them to carry you through the difficulties? We were not made to go it alone, especially in the hard times. That is the point of relationships and community.

Let us be men who know who our true friends are, and let us turn to them for aid when times get hard. Let us not shut them out of the pain and difficulties, but let us invite them into it, knowing that they love us and simply want to help.

"Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another."

To God alone be the Glory!

Strength and Honor